Author Archives: Ed Hoornaert

Effing Feline overindulges #wewriwa

  I, Effing Feline, don’t feel two good right now, so . . . right to business. I’m continuing with snniipets . . .  a snippet from my pett hooman’s WHIP . . . . er, WIP. It’s called, an’ I’m gonna type reel careful now — The Seven Foot Cupid.  Lasht weak we met […]

Effing Feline belches #wewriwa

I, Effing Feline, sometimes despair of my pet human, Ed. He’s a writer, a word person, who worked hard this week on a blurb for his latest WIP, The Seven Foot Cupid. But he got it all wrong! What he wrote (shown at the end of this blog) isn’t even close to a blurb. The Feline […]

Get your claws ready #mfrwhooks

I, Effing Feline, love shredding things with my claws. It’s not only good exercise, it’s good for the soul. Today I offer you the chance to shred. The shreddee is the blurb for book one of pet human’s WIP trilogy. Unleash your inner wildcat — cut Ed’s ego down to size — make as many suggestions […]

Effing Feline sighs #wewriwa

I, Effing Feline, have a shameful confession to make. I still haven’t caught a mouse. I say “still” because I’ve confessed this shortcoming a couple years ago. Still no luck! Mostly that’s because there’s never been even a single mouse in the house where I’m confined. The longer my mouseless streak goes on, though, the more […]

Effing Feline’s mailbag #wewriwa

Every week I, Effing Feline, give the followers of my weekly blog the incalculable benefits of my wisdom. Now it’s your turn. I’ll tell you about it after this word from my sponsor, The Saint of Quarantine Island. Kendo Carlisle, the Saint of Gilford Island, responds to Janet’s striptease. “There’s something you should know about me.” His […]

Yep, you’re cold #mfrwhooks

I, Effing Feline, have a few questions for all of you. They may seem like silly questions, but I’m serious, so please be serious in return, okay? What happened to your tail? Did it hurt? Humans do  have tails, don’t they? I’m continuing with hooks from one of my pet human’s favorite books, Rescuing Prince […]

Effing Feline finds a use for pizza #wewriwa

I, Effing Feline, love my role models. You probably know one of them — Garfield. I have tried hard to emulate his wonderfully feline attitudes toward life and human beans. And pizza. You see, Garfield loves pizza. In this regard, though, I fail my hero. The only pizza I really like is meat pizza, without […]

His body pressed hers with delicious warmth and intimacy #mfrwhooks

I, Effing Feline, am back once again. I can hear you cheering from here! Thank you, thank you, thank you for recognizing my brilliance! I’m continuing with hooks from one of my pet human’s favorite books, Rescuing Prince Charming. It’s an SFR set in the near future. Dusty and the alien guard have gotten the time […]

Effing Feline wants to drive #wewriwa

I, Effing Feline, went for a car ride this week — to the vet. Yuck! The visit went fine, though, just a checkup, so what I want to talk about are automobiles. Ed drove me there. Next time I have a checkup, I want to drive myself. It seems pretty simple, with a few minor modifications. […]

Wow, you have a great arm #mfrwhooks

I, Effing Feline, am the world’s most literary cat. I can read, write, type . . . and criticize. My claws have been known to tear through the words written by my pet human, Ed Hoornaert. It’s fun! Ed accuses me of megalomania, but that’s okay. I’m sure you’ll agree that megalomania is a cat’s prerogative. […]