Effing Feline hates dentists #wewriwa

Photos: DepositPhotos

I, Effing Feline, hate dentists. Don’t you? They’re always asking you to open wider and then they have the nerve to poke around where only fresh salmon should dare to go.

But I know someone who loves the dentist, which makes me wonder about his mental health. I’ll tell you who after this message from my sponsor, Pandora Uncaged, a WIP by my pet human.

Pandora Dayle is the acting director of Quak, a veterinary-slash-research facility on a new colony planet. There are lots of beasties learn about. In last week’s snippet, you met some of them, called slytherins, they of the messy eating habits. Today we meet another of the native creatures, and we hear from a second, though we don’t meet it face to face quite yet.

When Pandora Dayle’s vision went black, she breathed a sigh of relief. The midday tropical sun was so ferocious today she wouldn’t have ventured out except for her sacred duty to her patients.

A growl, deep enough to make things on the supply shelf rattle, sounded from the windowless building.

“Good afternoon to you, too, Harry,” she said cheerfully as she flipped on the lights. “Get enough beauty sleep last night?”

The rare Harrison’s Pseudo Reptile rumbled out a huff of breath.

From farther inside the building came a growl . . . more of a stuttering bleat, really, with interesting hints of musical overtones. Pandy gave the ear-to-ear grin that only her beloved animals ever saw. At first, the new animal’s growl had scared her — too much like a beast attempting human speech — but now she appreciated its musical beauty.

When Harry the gator rumbled out another snarl, she chuckled. “I swear, sometimes it seems like you two critters are talking to each other so you won’t feel lonely.”

Effing Feline here again. I’m sorry to tell you (no, I’m not, because the kid pulled my tail once!) that Ed’s youngest grandson actually enjoyed his first trip to the dentist. The kid is, obviously, touched in the upper works.

It helps, of course, that he had no cavities.

Be sure to visit your dentist every six months. And while you sit in the waiting room, check out the other great writers in Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday.

Pandora Uncaged

Pandora Dayle is her family’s black sheep. Ten years after running away from home, she’s rebuilt her self-respect at an isolated facility for saving animals native to her colony’s planet. Her redemption feels as fragile as a dream, but she’ll be okay if nothing traumatic happens.

But when the best friend from her innocent childhood arrives, her insecurities mushroom.

Aidan used to be Pandora’s best friend. Since his teen years, he’s held heroic jobs—police officer and now Search and Rescue leader. He adored innocent young Pandora so much he compares every woman to her idealized memory, and finds them wanting.

But when he rediscovers the real thing, she’s not at all what he expected.

Booker, a naïve Apprentice Cupid for a secret organization, receives his second assignment: get Pandora and Aidan to mate. They’d been close friends, so his strategy is simple: He flies Aidan to her island and orders him to impregnate Pandora.

What could possibly go wrong?



  1. He’s so cute! (But so are you, Effing!)

    Ed, you do alien creatures so well!

    1. Alien creatures and secondary characters, according to my wife.

  2. I’m having visions of Ellie May Clampett with all these critters she talks to…
    Cute pic of the grandchild. They’re so much fun you wish you’d skipped your own kids and went straight to them 😉

    1. Was Ellie May big on animals? I vaguely remember which show you’re referring to, though not by name, but beyond that, nothing.

  3. Author Jessica E. Subject · · Reply

    It’s interesting that these creatures seemed ferocious at first, but not so much now that Pandora has gotten to know them. Nice snippet!

    1. But is this a one-off, or is the mobeave now friendly to her all the time?

  4. I suspect the creatures are talking to each other.

    1. What are they saying, I wonder?

  5. Pandora loves those animals. Cupid won’t have much chance of making a match unless the guy also lives weird animals.

    1. She thinks she got the job of acting supervisor because she’s the only full-time employee left, and while that’s a factor, a bigger factor is how much she loves her beasts.

  6. I so enjoy coming back each time to see what new animal is on the agenda. This book is so much fun.

    1. Next week will be more of Harry before we move on to a different critter.

  7. This being an Ed H. story, I’m certain those animals are talking to each other.

    1. That’s interesting, because when I wrote it, that was just a throwaway line. Since then, though, I have managed to figure out a way it can fit into the storyline.

  8. Nice introduction to some of the animals! Enjoyed the excerpt…

    1. Two of my beta readers commented on how much they like the animals, which encouraged me to share them with weekend warriors.

  9. We get such a picture of Pandora’s character from her interaction with the animals. And I’m certain you had a field day, Ed, creating all these out-of-this-world animals!

    Effing, I hate the dentist too, but he’s a necessary evil. I get a crown at the end of this week which hurts twice–once in the mouth and once in the pocketbook!

    1. Hey, Jenna, I’m getting a crown next week, too. Just call me King Edward VIII.

  10. deesknight · · Reply

    Hopefully the youngin’ will continue to enjoy dental visits! He’s adorable!

    Love the Pandora story. I’ll bet the two beasties ARE talking. I wonder if we’ll get to hear what they are saying…?

    1. The test of his love of dentistry will come the first time that roaring drill approaches his mouth.

  11. Great what you can get used to once you understand the language. And just wait, once that first cavity comes along, he won’t be enjoying those trips much longer. As we ALL will attest.

    1. It must take a special kind of person to make their living doing something that your customers don’t enjoy.

  12. Pandora is fearless. Apparently your grandson is too. 🙂

  13. Both Pandora and your grandson appear to be fearless.

    1. I will say that compared to his brother, Logan is relatively fearless.

  14. Elaine Cantrell · · Reply

    She does seem to enjoy the animals. That says a lot about her character.

    1. Are you trying to say she has a beastly personality?

  15. Nice description of the beast’s growl and how she now sees the beauty in it. That’s great that your grandson liked the dentist! It’s so important to take care of your teeth, and it’s always better if you like it.

    1. Thanks for stopping by, Kate!

  16. Diane Burton · · Reply

    What a darling picture of a brave boy. 🙂 My grandchildren had a great intro to the dentist, too. Love the animals in this story. They show much about Pandora’s character.

    1. Pandora’s love of animals is a huge part of her life.

  17. If the creatures are talking to each other, what are they chatting about? 🙂

    1. Unless we learn their language, we may never know.

  18. I think Pandy has a neat situation. I tend to prefer animals to people myself.
    I too hate going to the dentist. It’s one of those things that I really should do. I haven’t been to one in literal years.

    1. I think a fair number of writers prefer animals. It’s an introvert’s job, after all, and introverts like animals.

  19. I wondered the same thing that Karen did. What kind of plans are those animals making? 🙂

    Your grandson is adorable! Such a little cutie. I’, with Effing. Major angst when it’s time for cleaning and Xrays.

    1. I had such terrible teeth as a child that I know dentist’s far most closely than I would ever wish.

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