I, Effing Feline, am about to shock you, so hold onto your hair pieces. I sometimes take naps.
Most cats do, of course, but I am such an exceptional specimen, a cat who has accomplished so much, that I know you’re thinking I work 16 hours a day, every day. But I am a BIG CAT — big enough to admit that I may, occasionally, take a short cat nap.
And that’s why I’m changing to a different book. Enough with Constellation XXI. Instead, I’m flitting back in time to one of Mr V’s personal faves, Alien Contact for Kid Sisters. He has said he wishes it wasn’t so much hassle to change a title, because he belatedly thought of a better title — Alien Contact for Kidnapped Sisters.
Since I love naps, here’s the very opening of Ed’s NAPPED book.
“Fifty, fifty-five, sixty,” the white-haired tourist said; “there you go, chief, paid in full.”
Chief? Quinn Lebatarde’s lips tightened at the insult, but almost immediately, he grinned. The tourist’s clothes shouted money to burn, as did his Rolex watch and expensive digital SLR camera, so Quinn pocketed the money but held onto the cheap, plaster replica of an ancient Kwadran woodcarving the man and his wife were buying.
Time for some fun. Hordes of tourists crowded the streets, celebrating the birth of the heir to Kwadra’s throne, so business was great; only three more ‘carvings,’ a mask, and some miniature totem poles remained on his rickety street-side table. The prospect of conning this man made Quinn’s day even brighter.
“All original,” he said in the thick accent and broken English dumb tourists expected; if you spoke too well, they didn’t believe you were from an alternate Earth. “Maybe I sell too cheap.”
Instead of giving them their mythological monster from Kwadra’s distant past, he clutched it to his chest — but not very hard, because the trashy fakes broke under the least pressure.
Effing Feline here again. This is book two in the Alien Contact for Idiots series, but I can’t imagine reading them all. Five books so far? That’s enough to make me need to (yawn) take a nap just (yawn) thinking about . . .
Alien Contact for Kid Sisters
Fleeing murderous rebels, the queen’s sister finds an alien hero
to save her . . . or is he kidnapping her, instead?
Marianne Harmon is sick and tired of being just the kid sister of the famous queen of Kwadra Island, home of the marooned aliens from an alternate Earth. Although she daydreams about being a warrior, when rebels bomb the royal ball she’s shunted to one of the many tunnels that honeycomb Kwadra, where she awaits a captain of the valiant Royal Guardians.
Quinn Lebatarde, a Kwadran scam artist fleeing the police, dons the uniform of a Royal Guardian killed by a tunnel collapse. When Marianne mistakes him for her bodyguard, Quinn can’t decide whether to save the feisty maiden, fall in love with her — or get rich by kidnapping her. With bloodthirsty rebels pursuing them and a treasure map in his pocket, what will he choose?
A worthy follow-up to Alien Contact for Idiots, this tale soars as a grand adventure of science fiction romance in the spirit of Romancing the Stone.