Effing Feline wishes for . . . ?

Photos: DepositPhotos

I, Effing Feline, think that the saying “Be careful what you wish for” applies only to humans, not cats. For example, Mrs Valentine (Ed’s wife) wished for cool weather during her recent trip from Arizona to Toronto to visit the two sons who live there. What she got was freezing rain, snow, and frigid temperatures. Be careful what you wish for!

But it’s different for cats. I wish for a pound of fresh salmon and four tokes of catnip every day. What could possibly go wrong?

Here’s another snippet from Ed’s WIP, the 5th book in his Alien Contact for Idiots series.

Audra Verhailey, a runaway young mother, flees with her baby from Oregon to Kwadra Island, which native Americans from an alternate Earth have ‘hopped’ to our Earth. She’s so desperate that she accepts the help of a Kwadran construction worker she doesn’t know. Now she’s having second thoughts . . . third thoughts . . . fourth thoughts.

Everybody, or at least every woman, knew that a guy who abandoned work to help a total stranger was damned suspicious; he must want something from her.

He’d gotten back in his truck and drove them into the wilderness for nearly an hour, then hiked up this mountain with her. He even carried her backpack, heavy with diapers, toys, formula, baby food, a single change of clothes for herself, two flashlights, and, heaviest of all, sixty-four size-AAA batteries.

And now, as Audra hurried to catch up to him, she prayed the something he wanted wasn’t her in an unmarked grave.

It was theoretically possible he was greatest gentleman alive, but as Kwadrans like him said, hah to that. He was a guy, so threats were more likely than gentlemanly manners. Her bootleg map indicated this mountainside was roughly where she needed to be — but there was nobody around for miles to hear cries for help. That made her the most naive idiot still breathing . . . at least for a while.

And it was nobody’s fault but her own.

She’d told herself over and over not to trust muscular, macho guys, but after puzzling over a map written in an alien language, with a dollar and eighteen cents in her purse and half of yesterday’s banana in her belly, she’d felt so desperate that she’d gone and trusted him anyway.

Effing Feline here again. This lady wishes this dude will help her, not hurt her — but remember, humans should be careful what they wish for. Is there anything you wish for that might end badly?

I promise it won’t end badly if you visit the other writers in Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday.

Here are the other books in the Alien Contact for Idiots series. Although part of a series, each story stands alone, so you can start with any book.

Alien Contact for Idiots
(4.2 stars out of 5 on Amazon)

What’s a woman going to do when she’s quarantined with an out-of-this-world alien?

This book has heroic cats who torment the villain!

Alien Contact for Kid Sisters
(4.6 stars out of 5 on Amazon)

Fleeing murderous rebels, the queen’s sister finds a hero to save her. Or is he kidnapping her, instead?


(4.7 stars out of 5 on Amazon)

She was born to kill. Not love.



Rescuing Prince Charming
(4.6 stars out of 5 on Amazon)

She’s no heroine. He’s no prince charming.

This one features Priscilla the cat in a major role, which makes it Ed’s best book yet!



  1. What a delicious snippet. Possible sex and salmon. What could be bad?

    1. Oh, any of us writers could think of some complications.

  2. Author Jessica E. Subject · · Reply

    It’s finally spring up here in Ontario now. Took a bit, but we don’t have to wear winter coats anymore. 🙂

    I understand her suspicions, but she seems to have not had a choice but to trust him. Great snippet!

    1. My wife has returned from Toronto in time for her birthday and she *loved* your weather. It’s funny — she wasn’t enamored of the cold when we lived in the BC Rockies, but years of Arizona’s relentless, killing heat have turned her into a huge fan of cold temperatures.

  3. julieevelynjoyce · · Reply

    As Jessica said, spring has finally sprung. I’m sorry your wife missed it by just a week. Loved the excerpt, especially the bit about the batteries. Those are always the ones I can never find when I need ’em! I wish that a hunky man would knock on my door asking to borrow sugar. That can’t possibly end badly, right?

    1. As I told Jessica above, Judi really liked being cold, being able to wear sweaters, piling on the blankets in bed. I think she’s glad she missed spring. Yeah, my wife is weird, but then she’s my wife, and I don’t dream of tropical beach vacations. I dream of visiting Iceland, or sailing Norway’s fjords, or seeing the Arctic Ocean. What in heaven’s name are the two of us doing in Arizona?

  4. Great job of capturing how women think. 😉 Intriguing snippet!

    1. Capturing how a woman would think in this situation was easy: it’s how a man might feel but would never, ever, acknowledge it.

  5. Just keeps getting more and more intriguing! I can’t wait for the eventual explanation of why she’s doing this…I’m really hooked on the story, great snippet.

    1. The lady is in jeopardy — one of the keys, as you know, to engaging readers’ empathy. But I’m stringing out the explanation of what’s going on. You don’t even learn where she’s hoping to go until the end of chapter one.

  6. nancygideon · · Reply

    What could go wrong? I think she’s more worried about what could go RIGHT with Mr. Hunky Man rescuer! Happy Spring at Last!

    1. Not yet, she isn’t. Eventually? Of course!

  7. Interesting internal conflict. That’s a tough choice.

    1. To get to this point in her life, she’s made a series of many bad choices. And as you know, BAD CHOICES = GOOD STORY.

  8. She must be desperate to go off with her baby into the wilderness with a stranger- makes me all the more curious about why she’s doing this.

    1. Excellent. The more curious, the better.

  9. Diane Burton · · Reply

    Spring has finally come to Michigan, too. Hurray!

    Great snippet. She’s desperate, hungry, carrying a baby, and my 1st question is why. Who/What is she escaping from? You give us a hint of her past with her attitude toward big men. I’m really curious.

    1. Mid-ninety degree temps have finally come to Arizona. Oh joy, joy.

  10. Karen Michelle Nutt · · Reply

    Her worry comes through in this snippet. I’m worried too. lol However, I hope the muscular, macho guy comes through for her . 🙂

    1. I’m glad you don’t simply assume that everything will turn out all right for her. It’s too soon for that!

  11. Very intriguing – what’s on the map?

  12. Yike! I guess I forgot to explain that!

    Kwadra Island is an alternate Earth’s Vancouver Island. The Kwadrans “hopped” their island to our Earth when the environment of their planet became so polluted and globally warmed that it was close to uninhabitable. Now there are two identical islands off the west coast.

  13. I hope her trust is not misplaced.

    1. She hopes that, too.

  14. elainecsc2013 · · Reply

    Looks as if she didn’t have a lot of choice, but I understand her concern.

    1. When you’re poor and on the run, you don’t have a lot of choices.

  15. Wonder whether her gut will be right or wrong!

    1. I hope her gut is right. She has enough problems without diarrhea.

  16. I’m very interested in why she’s lugging around so many AAA batteries.

    1. That little details is there to incite curiosity. I’m glad it did its job.

  17. Love your writing ‘voice’ in this snippet!

    1. Thanks, Rose. I love your in this comment, too!

  18. First of all, apologies to Effing for being so late to comment on Ed’s snippet – yes I know I can trust you to pass on the apologies, Effing! My excuse is spring has finally come to the UK too, and I’ve been out and about with the four legged friends and not on-line much. Anyway, another great snippet, giving us even more insight to her uncertainties and mistrust – which I can understand, even though the poor guy seems to be doing everything in his power to help her!

    1. Spring fever strikes the UK. I completely understand.

  19. In the middle of nowhere, with a total macho silent stranger, and just about nothing left to lose other than her child and her life, what could possibly go wrong? Everything. Everything could go wrong. Poor girl. I still really want to know what brought her to this planet though! The suspense is killing me!

    1. Don’t let it do that, Daelyn! I want to keep reading your snippets!

  20. Still unusually warm here 🙂
    Interesting snippet. I like her thought processing … and can’t wait to find out more about why she is in this situation.

    1. Thanks for stopping by, Iris!

  21. The last para is perfect, justifying trust after all of her internal analytics of men. 🙂

    Spring has sprung here, too. A chilly spring, but at least the birds are singing and the grass is green. 🙂

    1. Her trust isn’t completely won so quickly. This is a temporary victory along the way to regaining trust.

  22. I think she’s right to be suspicious, but then again, what choice does she have? She’s pretty vulnerable right now. I hope it works out all right for her. Good background info here.

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