I, Effing Feline, told you last week how the song Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer should actually be Ildephonse the Red-Nosed Kit Cat. Today I set the record straight about another Christmas song that fails to give cats their due. Here’s a clue to the song I’m talking about:
Before I disclose the name of the scurrilous song, here’s a snippet from Ed’s recent sci fi romance, Rescuing Prince Charming. Dusty has helped a guard remove his pants, which had gotten snagged as he crawled through a short tunnel while searching for a time bomb set to explode any minute.
Creeping forward, he left his slacks behind. A jagged shard of metal had snared them, an inexcusable design flaw even for a prototype. Unreasonable deadlines might literally be the death of them all.
Dusty pointed her flashlight to help him see, and was rewarded with tight buttocks in typical Kwadran underwear, resembling a thong. She turned her flashlight aside a moment later than she should have.
And then regretted it. She’d never have such a chance again — might never have a chance to do anything — so what did it matter if she peeked?
But when she looked again, the tunnel was empty. He’d reached the closet-sized room at the other end.
Effing Feline here again. Did you figure out the song that disses cats? If you did, you’re nearly as smart as a cat. Here are the real words:
Toofy the Snowcat
Was a purry, happy puss
With some snow white fur
And whiskers of straw
He was tough and not a wuss
Henceforth, you are allowed to sing only this version. I mean it! Santa Claws is watching you!
Rescuing Prince Charming
Alien Contact for Idiots, book four
She’s no heroine. He’s no Prince Charming.
Dusty Johnson, a self-styled ordinary, everyday woman, responds with extraordinary heroism when saboteurs try to bomb the prototype of Earth’s first starship. Although she yearns to return to anonymity, that moment of courage propels her ever deeper into dangers that tear the scabs off her dark secrets—and thrust her into the arms of the unattainable man of her dreams.
Reese Eaglesbrood, an alien prince, yearns to restore his tattered reputation by guiding the starship project to completion, but his fascination with the unassuming heroine threatens to undermine his fragile authority. Shunning Dusty is necessary, yet unthinkable—and when the saboteurs strike again, she is his only ally against Earth’s most elusive enemies.