Effing Feline has a new hobby

Photos: DepositPhotos

I, Effing Feline, have gotten interested in tracking down my ancestors, and I’ve discovered some cats who are worthy of my bloodline.

Bucky Katt, my idle

Like Bucky B. Katt. He’s described on his Wiki page as selfish, cynical, and lazy — my hero! Some say Bucky isn’t real, a mere creation for the Get Fuzzy comic strip, but such a paragon of felininity simply must be my relative.

From the sublime to the ridiculous . . . another snippet from an upcoming sci fi romance by my pet human: Rescuing Prince Charming. Last week, tech writer Dusty Johnson shocked herself by searching for a saboteur’s time bomb in the belly of a half-built starship. The bomb is set to go off in mere minutes.

Only one Kwadran (they’re aliens from the future) dares to help her dispose of the bomb. In this scene they’ve found the bomb and are racing to toss it in the ocean. But a slip of the tongue causes an unexpected delay, and a delay is the last thing she wants. Because the bomb is ticking.

“This is the fourth sabotage attempt in the last few months.” Dusty was panting; too much time spent behind a desk.

“Third,” he corrected.

“Fourth.”

“You know more about this than Security?” He stopped abruptly and shone his flashlight at her face as though interrogating her; his voice was all Kwadran, curt and accusing. “How?”

Temporarily blinded, she banged her elbow against a sharp edge, sending a spear of pain down her ulnar nerve. She rubbed her crazy bone. “Trust me — the gossip mill down here is the most efficient communication device ever devised by mankind.”

Effing Feline here again. I totally believe that gossip is more efficient than high tech security. After all, gossip is how cats have spread the word about their magnificence among humans for eons.

Speaking of magnificence, Bucky Katt has nine lives of it. For example, many Get Fuzzy story lines show Bucky inventing ways to antagonize and annoy Rob (his pet human) and Satchel (a dog). Annoying them is his hobby, and that is magnificence I vow to emulate.

Be sure to visit the magnificence of the Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday authors.

Rescuing Prince Charming
Alien Contact for Idiots, book four

Available December 4

Dusty Johnson, a self-styled ordinary, everyday woman, responds with extraordinary heroism when saboteurs try to bomb the prototype of Earth’s first starship. Although she yearns to return to anonymity, that moment of courage propels her ever deeper into dangers that tear the scabs off her dark secrets—and thrust her into the arms of the unattainable man of her dreams.

Reese Eaglesbrood, an alien prince, yearns to restore his tattered reputation by guiding the starship project to completion, but his fascination with the unassuming heroine threatens to undermine his fragile authority. Shunning Dusty is necessary, yet unthinkable—and when the saboteurs strike again, she is his only ally against Earth’s most elusive enemies.

Rescuing Prince Charming is now available for pre-sale. If anyone is willing to post an honest review (and yes, I really mean honest) soon after release, I could probably be talked into sending a pre-release copy their way.

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46 comments

  1. Hey, Ed — I’d love to do a review! I think you have my email address… PDF preferred.

    Tell Effing that too much knowledge can be a dangerous thing…!

    1. Both too much knowledge, and too much catnip.

  2. Gossip can be very effective at passing along inside information, though it can also be like playing a game of telephone.

    1. Gossip can definitely mislead, which is one reason Dusty expresses an urgent desire, a couple chapters later, to avoid giving the gossip mill anything to get started with.

  3. I love all the narrative descriptions in this snippet. I’m amazed by how smoothly you conveyed actions and tone while remaining concise.. Great snippet!

    1. . . . blush . . .

  4. Yes, this author is a smooth guy who writes so well. Nifty snippet, my friend.

    1. . . . blush deepens . . .

  5. Author Jessica E. Subject · · Reply

    I don’t think he likes that she knows more than him. Great snippet! 🙂

    1. Dusty’s stereotypes of the alien Kwadrans is that they’re arrogant. She assumes that he dislikes that any American knows more than he does, although that assumption is incorrect. He’s worried that the project’s security doesn’t have all the right information.

  6. nancygideon · · Reply

    LOVE Get Fuzzy! Effing has an amazing role model. Great interplay in this scene, so filled with sparks of personality.

    1. You, my dear Nancy, are a bad influence if you think Bucky if a good role model.

  7. nancygideon · · Reply

    Oh, and I’d be honored to do a review, Ed. I’ve got three weeks off work coming up and would love to have something to look forward to!

    1. I’ll be in touch, Nancy.

  8. Sometimes unofficial channels can provide the best information. I’m glad Effing has found such a great role model!

    1. Not another one who thinks that annoying me is good hobby for Effing. Sheesh.

  9. I absolutely agree with Effing: Gossip is sometimes way more accurate and efficient than normal channels of communication. Hope they still manage to get that bomb disposed of!

    1. If they don’t dispose of the bomb and it goes off while they’re carrying it, this will be a short story rather than a novel.

  10. I believe her – sharp eyes and gossip in the underbelly of the ship.

    1. The opening is downright noir.

  11. Gossip is a good channel for news, but is it trustworthy? Great snippet!

    1. I’m glad you’re keeping your critical faculties in high gear.

  12. Oops is right–at least she covered well 🙂 Great snippet 🙂

    1. But is there anything sinister behind her slip? Hmm.

  13. I love that last line! 😀

    1. The gossip mill amongst the project’s workers is a (minor) sub-thread throughout the novel.

  14. Well he’s certainly getting sidetracked at the wrong moment! But I like his overall sense of urgency. Really enjoying these snippets!

    1. Her comment took him by surprise, making him wonder if she’s associated with the saboteurs. That’s the only reason he stopped.

  15. That tidbit must have been quite the “bomb” to get him to stop in the middle of disposing of the real bomb. Way to up the tension in an already tense situation!

    1. A punster after my own heart!

  16. Karen Michelle Nutt · · Reply

    Yep, gossip can be a great source of information. Loved the easy banter between them.

    1. She has quite the mouth on her.

  17. Gossip is probably the best form of communication known to mankind.

    1. But not necessarily the most accurate.

  18. Gossip is not only an incredibly efficient form of communication, it can also be rather misleading, but Dusty seems pretty sure of her facts. I have to say I find her Kwadran just a wee bit patronising, not to mention a bit crazy seeing as how he’s stopping to correct her while the bomb continues to tick! Don’t worry, dear Effing, I don’t think Bucky Katt can actually hold a candle to you in the annoying and highly conceited stakes, you’re right there on the pinnacle!

    1. Dusty would agree with the word patronising, though she’d probably prefer ‘arrogant’.

      I’ll pass along your high praise to Effing. He’ll be delighted.

  19. LOL re the last line. So true.

    1. Throughout the book, we see Dusty’s irritation with the gossip mill. She’s a private person.

  20. That last line has so much truth in it. Great snippet.

    1. So long as you don’t expect ‘efficient’ to mean ‘accurate’.

  21. Great snippet. Not exactly the time to be asking questions, though.

    1. Her comment startled him so much that he had to stop, though only for a moment.

  22. “Trust me — the gossip mill down here is the most efficient communication device ever devised by mankind.”

    Sounds like the last place I worked.

    1. Hah! I hope that was a good kind of gossip.

  23. Diane Burton · · Reply

    Effing has chosen quite a heritage for himself. LOL Good snippet, full of tension plus a tense moment when he stops. What is he thinking?

    1. Glad you like the snippet. As for why he stops, he isn’t thinking, just reacting. Her comment raises his suspicions that maybe she’s involved in the sabotage.

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