Effing Feline gets the bird

Photos: DepositPhotos

Fart-Fueled Flying Feline, Effing for short, writes the Weekend Writing Warrior / Sunday Snippet posts on Mr. V’s behalf. Click the pic for info.

I, Effing Feline, dreamt I chased a bird — and caught it!

I don’t know how I got outside.  That’s the way of dreams, you know?  Birds love the olive tree with seven trunks outside our floor-to-ceiling window, and in my dream I saw the world’s biggest bird sitting in the tree.  I leaped.  Extended my claws.

Caught the bird!

Today, another snippet from Ed’s WIP, Secrets of Love and War. The captured human bomber pilot, Norse Malstrom, awoke in hospital, groggy and drugged up.  He fought the well-meaning alien doctors, thinking they were monsters.

The doctors ask Cynthia to try to get him safely back in bed — and he does not think she’s a monster.

The alien-sounding hiss of hell’s doorway jerked Norse to hands and knees.  He had to fight!

With a supreme effort that seemed to leave half his flesh torn and quivering on the floor, he lunged to his feet.  Turned to the door.

But it was a beautiful woman.  A saint, an Angel of Splendor.

He stumbled into the angel’s arms.  As she guided him to lay on a smotheringly soft gurney, he tried to stroke her cheek but he lacked the strength to do anything but lie there and leak tears of gratitude.

But with another supreme effort, when her angelic face was close to his as she strapped him in, he croaked out two words.

“Thank you.”

Effing Feline here again.  My dream turned into a nightmare — for this is the bird I ‘caught,’ and he was bigger than me!

Be sure to visit the other Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday authors.




  1. It’s a bit funny how he is not thinking straight and can go from willing to fight to being ok with being attached to the bed just because of what she looks like.

    1. There are probably several intermediate steps that he’s too groggy to have noticed.

  2. Is she an alien angel?

    Our dog barks at hawks.

    1. She’s alien only in the sense of living on different planet than he does. Our dog barks at sparrows and the like that are foraging on the ground, but pays no attention to big birds in trees.

  3. Author Jessica E. Subject · · Reply

    I think it’s interesting how he sees her as an angel yet the doctors as monsters. I’m definitely looking forward to reading more!

    And Effing, you need to watch out for those big birds! Though there was a murder of about 5 young crows hanging out at the top of a tree in the neighborhood. I would have been glad for you to chase them away with all the noise they were making.

    1. In the last couple of years, the pine in the back yard has become a favorite of noisy crows, and there is a reason a group of the noxious birds is called a “murder”!

  4. He’s really out of it, isn’t he? You show his confused mental state very well.

    1. I’ve been told I’m really good at writing crazy people. I’m sure that says nothing at all about me as a person.

  5. You’ve described his weakness very well. I can almost feel the lack of strength as he lies there unable to even raise a hand to her cheek. Nice snippet!

    Effing, you need to be careful. Hawks can easily carry off cats of your size. Stick to canaries or sparrows if you have to pounce!

    1. As I said a couple weeks ago, the out-of-his-head aspect of these scenes was based on my own experience while in hospital, so I had a source for the details I used.

  6. Ed, you were sick months ago and portrayed this so well. Taken from life, stories often are wonderful.

    1. If nothing else, they can be vivid!

  7. Well she just sapped the rest of his manly strength–great snippet 🙂
    And feline, you should count your blessings you weren’t carved up for that bird’s dinner 🙂

    1. ‘Sapping’ is one way of looking at it. ‘Reassuring and comforting’ is another.

  8. His weakness and confusion are wonderfully written. Heads get very muddled in that condition – clear thoughts aren’t always possible. Well done.

    Effing – check the cat handbook – rule 16 – don’t play with hawks. They don’t play nice.


    1. I checked the handbook, but in the Arizona edition, rule 16 is “Don’t play with gila monsters; they’re poisonous.”

  9. kimmydonn · · Reply

    Oh no! Watch out for those birds Effing! Great snippet, Ed. Our saviours always seem more amazing in the moment. I wonder if she’ll still be an angel when he wakes up.

    1. Considering how much she dislikes what he’s done (bombing her city) your concern is well founded.

  10. Jacob Rosemeier · · Reply

    He goes from fighting for his life to falling into a stranger’s arms in seconds haha. And what a HORRIFYING nightmare!

    1. Yep, it’s a bad nightmare — but even worse, for him it’s now his real life.

  11. Hopefully she an “angel” and not one of the bad guys! 😉

    1. From his point of view, she’s probably a bad guy in that she lives among the enemy Riksids and admires them. She’s even been adopted into one of their clans.

  12. I can see why he’d be so relieved to see another human, but she might not be so fond of him after what he did to the planet! The doctors might be safer.

    1. I see what you’re saying, but now the doctors are upset with him for the way he treated them.

  13. Well he’s polite enough to her, if very unsuspicious. I’m sure there will be many interesting twists and turns ahead. Enjoyed the excerpt!

    1. It’ll be interesting to see how he reacts once he’s in his right mind again.

  14. Diane Burton · · Reply

    Good except. What crazy dreams he’s having. Like Effing.

    1. Uh oh, Diane. You’ve insulted Effing by saying he’s like a mere human being.

  15. nancygideon · · Reply

    I love the way he clings to her as something familiar he can trust when that couldn’t be farther from the truth . . . yet. Don’t eat that, Effing! You don’t know know where it’s been!!

    1. Better advice for Effing would be “Don’t get eaten, Effing!”

  16. At least he’s cooperative right now! Hopefully he can get some help, though I’m not entirely on his side. I don’t buy his reasoning behind the attack.

    Effing, you have to watch out for birds. Some of them are pretty strong!

    1. It’s interesting that you aren’t on his side despite his suffering. I’ll have to work on building up his likability, seeing that he’s the romantic lead.

      1. I may not be a good sample audience. I’m generally unsympathetic towards people who do truly terrible things, regardless of motivation!

  17. Andrea R Huelsenbeck · · Reply

    Ooo, from fight instinct to sweet surrender.

    1. Semi-conscious awareness can snap between emotions in, well, a snap.

  18. Oh I really like the way you portray his confused state of mind and can almost feel the relief as he goes from seeing perceived monsters to seeing someone he perceives as an ‘angel’. I wonder if he would have been more suspicious had he been in his right mind. And Effing, you should be ashamed of yourself trying to catch one of our feathered friends, especially when you thought he was smaller than yo – that’s being a bully – play nice dear feline!

    1. If he were in his right mind, I’m sure he would notice how much she fears and hates him. As for Effing, his middle name may be spelled “Fueled” (Fart-Fueled Flying Feline), but it’s pronounced ‘Bully’. He’s a cat with an attitude problem.

  19. Karen Michelle Nutt · · Reply

    He’s seeing an angel, his savior. He might be a bit surprised once his head clears. Great snippet.

    1. Surprised and disappointed too.

  20. elainecsc2013 · · Reply

    From monsters to angels. I wonder if she’s the angel he thinks she is.

    1. In the sense that she’s human, yes she is. In the sense that she identifies with the Riksids, no she isn’t.

  21. kckendricks · · Reply

    Norse Malstrom is a great character name. I hope he finds his way through.

    1. Thanks! I had to work to find a name that ‘felt’ right to me. Malstrom is Danish for maelstrom, which certainly describes the effects of his bombing raid on this alien society. I don’t know if Norse is ever actually used as a first name, but it projects a suitably robust, masculine image for a romance hero.

  22. Outstanding job of conveying his confusion.

    It reminds me of one time my husband had surgery and he was in the recovery room and a nurse walked in and… I think I’ll just stop there. lol

    1. But you stopped just when it was getting interesting!

  23. I hope she’s there to help. Nice snippet.

    1. She’s been asked to help yes, but she isn’t his official nurse — yet.

  24. I think someone’s been giving him the GOOD drugs!

    1. It’s true that he’s feeling no pain.

  25. Sue Bar · · Reply

    I really liked the line ‘leaked tears of gratitude’ – simple, yet succinct.

    1. Thanks for stopping by, Sue!

  26. I like how you portray his mental and physical state. It’s so hard to be physically incapacitated and dependent on other people when you want nothing more than to get out of that place.

    1. His mental state is, well, “zonked out” by drugs and fear.

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