Effing Feline thinks warm thoughts

Space cat-wewriwa

Fart-Fueled Flying Feline, Effing for short, writes the Weekend Writing Warrior / Sunday Snippet posts on Mr. V’s behalf

I, Effing Feline, write this weekly column on behalf of my pet human, Ed Hoornaert, aka Mr Valentine. Mr V’s pretty happy this week, because one of his sons is visiting from some place called Canada. That’s even farther north than Phoenix, I think. Up there, houses are heated, instead of cooled. Those people have the right idea!

Today’s snippet will be one of the last from Thimbleriggers, a story in Future Love, Mr V’s new release. Young pornographer Aldous has used an experimental device to buy, for resale, 90-year-old Kathy’s erotic memories. After the recording session, Kathy starts to reveal her own scheme.

“When I researched your breadbox, I came across hints about transference. Do you know the psychological concept of transference?”

He didn’t want to admit his ignorance. She waited, squeezing him with her silence and forcing sound from his mouth.

“No,” he said.

“During intense psychological therapy, people often identify so strongly with the therapist that they fall in love with her. That’s transference. The research hinted at the breadbox’s capacity for transference, although no one had dared to mindscan so intensively and on such emotional topics as you did. But I wondered, and I hoped, because of my psychological profile.”

Her voice grew gentle as she said, “You’re in love with me, Aldous.”

Cat on radiatorEffing Feline here. Even if the young bad guy does love the ancient lady, what good does that do?

Ah well.  Instead of pondering that question, I think I’ll curl up on a warm lap and dream about sleeping atop a radiator.

Be sure to visit the other Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday posts.




  1. I love all the stories in Future Love. Will you start excerpting from another story or another book?

    1. Another book. I need to firm up a date for my next release (probably October something) and then figure out how long I want to highlight it here.

  2. Author Jessica E. Subject · · Reply

    Oh, sounds like she planned this all along. Great snippet! And right now, we’re cooling our houses in Canada. It’s been blasted hot here. Though, we got a bit of a break this weekend.

    1. You h ave my sympathy, Jessica. I’ve heard about the heat wave from son #3, who’s in Toronto. Son #2, who’s visiting us, is from Vancouver, which rarely gets hot.

  3. Awww,,,she’s been toying with him and now she’s caught her man. 😀 I like this very much.

    1. She hasn’t been a helpless pawn in all of this, even though you don’t learn that till near the end.

  4. daezarkian · · Reply

    Damn therapists with their truth bombs! ;D Great excerpt, Ed!

    1. Yep, never trust a social scientist (which Kathy was before she retired).

  5. Can you believe therapists? I don’t think so. But the concept of him falling in love with her is delicious.

    1. The mouse has turned around and trapped the cat!

  6. A sneaky woman! But, can she use this to help her husband?

    1. Excellent question, Aurora.

  7. Definitely not what he anticipated. I like this angle. 😉 Also, that photo is adorable!

    1. The woman from frigid Edmonton likes cats on radiators? It figures.

  8. Good intellectual conversation they’re having. Love the picture too!

    1. Great observation. As soon as Kathy leads the conversation, it becomes more intellectual.

  9. Sounds like she set a trap and sprung it. Smart lady!

    1. It was important in this story that Kathy be more than just a victim of the smarmy pornographer.

  10. Great ending – as I thought, the old woman has a sting in her tail. Great story.

    1. You’re saying she doesn’t have an ass, but an asp?

  11. Oops! Trapped! 🙂

    1. Like a diptera to fly paper.

  12. julieevelynjoyce · · Reply

    Oh man, that final line. You got me by the heartstrings! Very well done! 🙂

    1. Than you, Julie Evelyn (not quite sure what to call you now…)

  13. She waited, squeezing him with her silence and forcing sound from his mouth.

    Awesome sentence, Mr V!

    1. Sometimes silence has weight, when you know someone is waiting for you to respond.

  14. Wait…whaaat? That little minx was playing him all along? You go, girl!! Nice twist that I never saw coming!

    1. Your reaction to this twist warms my heart, Rose.

  15. Karen de Lange · · Reply

    “Squeezing him with her silence” – that’s brilliant. Excellent snippet.

    1. Thanks very much, Karen!

  16. nancygideon · · Reply

    Purrrrfect revenge, the victimized becoming the victor. Sweet!

    1. I’m much given to stories in which the underdog triumphs.

  17. Ha ha! I was hoping she had something up her sleeve. Great excerpt, Ed! –errr, Effing 🙂


    1. And she’s not finished yet!

  18. What a fun excerpt. Great character design.

    1. Thanks, Shari!

  19. Karen Michelle Nutt · · Reply

    Oh man, what is he going to say about that? Deny it, I bet. Even though it’s true. 🙂

    1. Imagine being a 20-something who is romantically in love with a 90-year-old. Poor guy.

  20. chellecordero · · Reply

    Love this twist!

    1. The little old lady is taking charge of the story.

  21. This is why you have to be careful what you wish for… you never know what you’ll actually get!

    1. Exactly, Caitlin. As a person who didn’t know what he wanted to be until he was nearly 40, I’ve always thought that knowing what you want can be even harder than working to get it.

  22. I don’t think he expected this.

    1. Hopefully readers won’t either.

  23. Love..She waited, squeezing him with her silence and forcing sound from his mouth.

    1. That’s a popular sentence. Thanks!

  24. Great twist… and now that her plan worked, how can she use his infatuation?

    1. Tune in next week, same time, same station.

  25. Great unexpected twist! I love the intricacies of this story.

    1. Thanks, Joyce!

  26. Love this line! “She waited, squeezing him with her silence and forcing sound from his mouth.” She’s a sneaky woman, ain’t she? I wonder why she wanted to test that theory though. What purpose it serves her. I hope we find out.

    1. What purpose? Check back this Sunday!

  27. In love huh? Can’t wait for next weeks.

    1. It’s a good thing for you, Cecilia, that you must wait only two days!

  28. Ah, the twist at the end that makes it all worthwhile. I love this woman who uses her brain (literally) to get what she wants.

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