Effing Feline, Drunk as a Thunk

Space cat-wewriwa

Fart-Fueled Flying Feline, Effing for short, writes the Weekend Writing Warrior posts on Mr. V’s behalf

I, Effing Feline, float high above the floor, turning lazily in the air, dreaming of mice, purring and stretching as I ride a purple haze of catnip-induced euphoria…

Anyone know any good rehab clinic for catnip addicts?

Back to work … gotta earn my catnip, eh?  Another snippet from Alien Contact for Kid Sisters, the latest release by Ed Hoornaert, aka Mr. Valentine, aka The Dreaded Catnip Pusher. It’s a sequel to the previous snippet, in which Quinn heroically drove off the bad guys. (If you remember, con-man Quinn is posing as Captain Charleyjohn, a married Royal Guardian.)

Marianne didn’t answer immediately. She couldn’t. Sitting beside this brave man, who’d risked his life to protect her and Elfy from a gang of rebel villains, made her belly thrum with desire. She had to be very careful, or she’d be leaping off a precipice marked The Other Woman, with a big red sign halfway down flashing Home Wrecker.

Could the cliff also be marked Bipolar Madness?

She felt as though she’d awakened from a half-sleep to vibrant, intoxicating awareness of herself and the world around her. She closed her eyes, hoping she wasn’t skyrocketing into a manic episode. Although this would be a horrible time to lose control, her feelings were so vivid and romantic—better than the world’s most beautiful sunset seen from a tropical beach while walking arm in arm with Brad Pitt—that she wouldn’t have missed them for the world.

She wanted Quinn with a ferocity that threatened to consume her, but acting on her feelings with a married man would be wrong, immoral, unforgivable. And despite her moments of wildness, she’d never done anything wicked, let alone evil.

… … Effing Feline here again. Still soaring.



Oh, go away! Check out the other great snippets from the Weekend Writing Warriors, and leave me alone!



  1. Poor Marianne, intoxicated with love!

    1. Dangerously so. Which will she choose: lust/love or self-respect?

  2. There is definitely something in that Catnip! Poor Marianne. I suspect her self-control is going to fall apart!

    1. In these snippets, I’ve never before mentioned that Marianne has recently been diagnosed as bipolar. That diagnosis makes her distrust herself, as you see here.

      1. Very interesting. I will be watching how that plays out in the rest of her responses. Thank you for sharing.

  3. Marianne is in a dilemma. I think she should not cross that line with a married man, but somehow she’ll let her feminine side get the better of her.

    1. We writers do love torturing our creations with dilemmas, don’t we?

  4. There’s trouble afoot, methinks. Will she or won’t. Tune in next week to find out, Mr. Valentine?

    1. I guess you’ll have to tune in next week to know my answer to your question.

  5. Talk about between a rock and a hard place! Fabulous description.

    1. Body says one thing, mind says another.

  6. Oh my, the emotions leap off the page in this excerpt inagoodway! Loved it, can’t wait for more…

    1. Thanks, Veronica!

  7. I’m confused. Does she know Quinn is Quinn and not that guard he was impersonating? Other than that… good intensity.

    1. She still thinks he is Captain Quinn Charleyjohn, who is married, rather than Quinn Lebatarde, who is not.

  8. Lovely description of falling in love – or at least lust. Her resolve to not be the other woman speaks well of her. Can’t wait to see how she does with it.

    1. At this point, unfortunately, her resolve is made of jello, not steel.

  9. These are not good feelings to be having for a conman. Of course, she doesn’t know he isn’t the most trustworthy of souls… yet.

    1. Trustworthy … yeah. LOL.

  10. Tough place for Marianne to be in – interested in seeing how this plays out.

    As to the catnip addiction – my feline is currently sleeping off her latest romp in the catnip – so if you find a good rehab – let me know 😉

    1. For a modest price of only $1000 per day, payable in advance in small, unmarked bills, I will personally supervise your cat’s rehabilitation. My dog Twiggles will act as my assistant.

  11. elainecsc2013 · · Reply

    Oh, she has it bad for him. It’ll be interesting to see if her conscience interferes with her pursuit. Oh yeah. If you need a partner in the cat rehab, at $1000 per day I’m your girl. LOL.

    1. Sounds good Elaine. You can be my assistant instead of Twiggles … but you’ll have to break the news to her, okay? I don’t THINK she’s bite you.

  12. Such torture! She’s got a battle raging between hormones and morals… 🙂 Good 8, Ed!

    1. Either way she loses, right? Poor kid.

  13. Karen Michelle Nutt · · Reply

    Will she cross the line or not? I’m interested in how this will play out.

  14. Writing while under the influence of catnip, I see. Either he’s married, or a conman. Poor girl. Such knowledge does nothing to ease the throbbing loins.

  15. chellecordero · · Reply

    Acckk, my first comment is MIA.
    I must have missed this info, how does she know that Quinn is married? It would open up some great possibilities if he isn’t. Very curious.

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