I, Fart-Fueled Flying Feline (Effing for short), have a confession to make. I’m doing everything backward today…or as we cats say, tail-first.
Today’s eight sentences from Edward Hoornaert’s new science fiction romance, Alien Contact for Idiots, are from the beginning of the book, even though previous excerpts have been from the middle. Moving backward, see?
The sentences describe the chaotic scene after our heroine, Seattle biologist Ell Harmon, has been chosen to investigate the middle-of-the-night arrival of a new, 280-mile long island off the coast of Washington. The government sends a helicopter to pick her up at a beach near her apartment.
Oh no, Mr Valentine caught me! He doesn’t like me presenting his work backwards and has threatened to give all my cat food to Garfield…who’s already rich, famous, and FAT. Personally I thought I had a cute idea, and my sense of humor is infinitely better than Mr. V’s. Here’s the excerpt the boring way:
This beach had been used in her favorite romantic comedy, Sleepless in Seattle—the scene where Meg Ryan watches Tom Hanks play with his son, but flees before introducing herself. Now, though, it resembled something out of a horror flick.
Across Elliot Bay, downtown’s lights were shrouded in fog and menace. Onlookers milled around Alki Avenue like a herd of hapless extras destined to become victims. On the sand, a female sergeant with rumpled hair and a nasty vocabulary bellowed into a bullhorn, directing a motley crew of firefighters, police, and assorted military as they positioned flares to make a huge circle of light in the sand. What with the shouting, the flickering shadows, and the flares’ acrid smoke, the circle resembled a satanic ritual—and its summoning worked. The devil himself, wearing the skin of a Coast Guard helicopter, snarled demonically as he descended toward the circle of flares.