Effing Feline Flies Again!

Space cat-8 sentence

Welcome back, humans. It’s me, Fart-Fueled Flying Feline introducing another excerpt for the weekend writing warriors’ Eight Sentence Sunday.

My nickname is Effing Feline. Mr. Valentine (aka Edward Hoornaert) tells me that ‘effing’ has naughty connotations. Like I care, right? I’m a cat, after all. I don’t care what anyone thinks.

I’m still choosing selections from Alien Contact for Idiots, a near-future science fiction romance slated for release March 12.  This one’s a continuation of last week’s post.

A duplicate of Vancouver Island mysteriously appears overnight. After Ell Harmon, a Seattle biologist, is sent to investigate, she contacts the not-of-our-earth humans on the island.  Here she talks on her cellphone with an army colonel, admitting a mistake while the aliens’ leader, Tro Eaglesbrood, looks on:

“I made a dumb mistake–I shook hands with two Kwadrans, and you know what that means.”

“Uh,” Wikstrom said, “they’re polite?”

“An exchange of germs.” She turned to Tro and said, “Do you know what germs are?”

“Of course I do,” Wikstrom said. “Just because I’m in the army doesn’t mean I’m—”

“Not you,” Ell said. “I’m talking to a Kwadran, so please wait, Colonel.”

Until next time, purr. (That’s Iranian-cat-talk for arrogant satisfaction.)

<<< — >>>

Read Effing’s previous post. And then be sure to check out the other writers
in the  weekend writing warriors’ Eight Sentence Sunday.

 Alien Contact for Idiots is available for pre-order on Amazon–at a special price of just 99c US.
Get it now, because the price goes up after release day, March 12!

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  1. Thank you for sharing, Mr Feline. I’d love to know why a Kwadran needs to be asked about germs.

    1. It’s a language issue, Kim. Kwadrans are from an alternate timeline that branched from ours around 1800. They have the concept of germs, but since the germ theory was developed long after 1800, they use a different term. For the same reason, they don’t have the word ‘okay’, which I repeatedly use as a communication issue.

  2. She’s nobody fool. She’s a biologist who kicks ass.

  3. This is a dangerous situation. I’m glad you thought of it. So many SF authors forget about inter-race immunity issues.

    1. I hate when that happens, Patricia. Sometimes, of course, we ignore immunity issues because they bollix our stories with too many details. In this case, though, the quarantine is my excuse to keep hero and heroine in close proximity long enough to fall in love.

  4. Ugh, alien cooties are the worst! At least they have hands.

    Weird- my two cats are also named Effing, sometimes. 🙂

    1. I can imagine that many cats get called “you effing cat!” Or perhaps even the unabbreviated version. 🙂

  5. Well, she is in charge, no doubt about that.

    1. My quick-and-dirty description of Ell is “a take-charge Seattle biologist”. I’m glad that comes through in this excerpt.

  6. It definitely comes through how no-nonsense your heroine is, which I like! Interesting re the germs issue…heck, the whole premise is fascinating. Great snippet!

    1. While judging some books for the Rita Contest, which I wrote about in a separate post, I noticed that several books were reaching extremely hard to find ways to get hero and heroine together, because their central premise didn’t cause the two people to be close proximity. When deciding if one of my romance ideas is strong enough to bother writing, I consider whether the concept forces proximity. A three-week quarantine, IMHO, was ideal!

      BTW, this is something you do very well in your books, Veronica.

  7. Interesting, Ed. I worked in a Bio lab for the last 8 years, and I often think about how writers don’t consider the risk when species from distant places come into contact with each other. I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s simply part of suspending our disbelief. 🙂

    Another good 8!

    And I admit to being amazed at discovering how common the name “Effing” is for a cat. lol 🙂

    1. I spent eleven years writing manuals at a software company that specialized in laboratory software. That certainly helped raise my awareness of diseases…but this just seems obvious to me.

      Plus it’s a way to lock my hero and heroine up together for three weeks. 🙂

  8. Ooh. Alien germs could be serious stuff!

  9. Excellent. I can’t wait to hear his/her/its answer. Clever world-building. Should make for some interesting interactions. Thank you

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