Science Fiction Jokes, part 2

And here’s more humor:

SF Jokes part 1
SF Jokes part 3
SF Jokes part 4 (feline edition)

And today, just what you’ve been waiting for–more nerdy sci-fi humor.  Like last time, let’s start with some groaners:

Why is an astronaut like a quarterback? They both want touchdowns.

Martian 1: Garble schnarff werbble schnip?
Martian 2: Bettettechnip.
Venusian Tourist: Bettettechnip? Dargle pufpuf Betenschdidd!
All: *Laughter*

Next, the obligatory science fiction writer joke:

 How many science fiction writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two, but it’s actually the same person doing it. He went back in time and met himself in the doorway and then the first one sat on the other one’s shoulder so that they were able to reach it. Then a major time paradox occurred and the entire room, light bulb, changer and all was blown out of existence

Jokes for the science-minded nerds amongst us:

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
One says, “I think I lost an electron!”
The other asks, “Are you sure?”
The first replies, “Yes, I’m positive.”

Heisenberg was speeding down the highway before a police officer pulled him over and
asked, “Do you know how fast you were going?”
Heisenberg replied, “No, but I know exactly where I am!”

Several cartoonists have a great sense of science fiction humor. One that I particularly like is T. McCracken’s McHumor.com.   Here are a couple of his beauties, just to give you a taste–starting with what is perhaps my all-time favorite science fiction cartoon.  Goes to show what strange tastes I have, eh?

McHumor1

McHumor2

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For men only beyond this point.  All earthlings of the female persuasion, please stop reading now.  You’ve been warned!

Some science fiction pick-up lines–some of which are guaranteed to elicit a slap in the
face, or perhaps a kick to an even more painful place:

  • I’ve been told I have the cool sexual prowess of a Romulan.
  • “Urkuk lu Stalga.” That’s Klingon for “I love you baby.”
  • Once you make love to a man with Vulcan ears on you never go back.
  • Nice buns, Princess! On your head, that is.
  • Not only can I beam you aboard, I can beam you a woody.
  • Someone must have shot you with a phaser set on ‘stunning’.
  • Tell me of this thing you humans call (pause) love.
  • Forgive my Kirk-like boldness, but you wanna go back to my mom’s place and watch ‘Dr. Who’?
  • Earth woman, prepare to be probed!
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2 comments

  1. Mary Roya · · Reply

    Enjoyed the chuckles. Even the pick up lines for the guys, it was ok for me to read as I already have my very own sweetie. No pick up line needed.

    1. Maybe you can use some of these lines in your own romances, Mary!

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